Comments on: Wheelchair Sex After Spinal Cord Injury

By: Deb

Deb — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 05:13:44 +0000

What a brilliant, well-written article! How guilty we all are of using labels to define ourselves and those we encounter. How do we shake these labels and the damage they create?

By: Rodrigo

Rodrigo — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 07:39:55 +0000

Me gust? la pagina!!!
Felicitaciones

By: Lee

Lee — Sat, 21 Aug 2010 15:24:44 +0000

I am a paraplegic for 33 years (T11) active wheelchair user – lm based in the UK. Since becoming disabled l have been sexually active, though for me l have always felt different. In my younger days l felt l was gay so had a lot of mixed experiences. Four years after paralysis l fell in love with a woman – we went on to have 2 children which was amazing – especially as the specialist consultant had warned it was highly unlikely that l would be able to have children – his warnings of doom and gloom where unfounded. This really only happened as my G/F was persistant she insisted – l was the passive partner. l now realise that lm gender queer and the worry of penis not errecting had never been of concern to me is the slightest – l know to some that is a huge issue. l have always much preferred to give oral. The other part of me which has always been strong is lm into BDSM and love it, lm 100% submissive. When it comes to partners l mostly look for others with a disability as l find its easier with less questions to answer – if there in a simular situation they will no doubt not need to ask silly questions and will anyway be more in tune with you. So the way forward is not always the one seen – is the idea that penatrative sex the only way – maybe not – just be willing to look outside outside the box as its more interesting and fun! Lee

By: Michelle donald

Michelle donald — Tue, 03 Aug 2010 17:25:04 +0000

It is wonderful to see others taking this subject seriously. So many newly injured people don’t ask due to fear and so many health care prof’s don’t ask due to fear! Sex is not taught yet we are all supposed to know how to do it!
I am a sex therapist (SCI T12).

By: Laurie

Laurie — Fri, 09 Jul 2010 18:11:18 +0000

I have been following your SPC forum going on 2 years, I have a friend in a relationship with a man in a chair, I read this article to share with her. I had no idea I needed this for myself. My sexuality withered and died with my diagnosis. I became a patient not a person, lost my privacy, independence and a large part of my identity. I have always provided the direction, motivation and the financial means for my family of 6. My husband has always been laid back, but when faced with assuming responsibility for the family he lost his hard won sobriety and overdosed twice requiring 2 separate inpatient confinements. Meanwhile back at the ranch I had 4 children no mobility, no income and a bleak prognosis. I held things together because that’s what I do. I put my husband out of the house until he could come back sober for the sake of the children. A well meaning social worker started a process that almost had my children removed from the home. I asked my husband to step up, come home, parent and honor his commitment in sickness and health. He did, but he has always had a low sex drive and since my DX has shown no interest. In the early years day to day survival as a family was my only priority. We are a stable family now, I am 47 and thought my sexuality was just another loss due to age, circumstance and disease. Your article made me realize nothing could be further from the truth. With all the doctors, counselors and professionals I have seen in the past 4 years you would think this subject would have come up at least once. Shame on them and thank you for being a voice and an educator for those of us considered not quite whole by mainstream medical professionals. My apologies to the professionals out there that see us for the individuals we are, I have just not met any of you yet.

By: em

em — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 17:10:58 +0000

Thank You for this piece. Fantastically inspiring and thorough. Hats off to You, and the wonderful service that You do here.

By: Graham

Graham — Sat, 26 Jun 2010 01:56:59 +0000

bb, we need alot more information before we can answer. What level is the spinal cord injury and when did it occour. Is it a complete or incomplete injury. How old are you and your partner. What country do you live in etc. The more you tell us the better we can help you.

By: bb

bb — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 18:26:45 +0000

my fience is a paraplegic and we wanna have a baby what are our options we want to have our own?

By: Sally

Sally — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 00:43:06 +0000

Great site. I’ve been with my share of men thru the years and have found that Quads are by far the best sex partners!!!! They are off the charts when it cums to to making me multi-orgasm. I now look for quads with tongues… and thumbs, make me sooooooooooooooo hot:)))))))

By: Chris

Chris — Wed, 02 Jun 2010 23:30:48 +0000

T8 Para here hugely impressed by this piece…